Hello! It's Tuesday! Is that good? :)
So if you didn't read yesterday's post, here you go.
Today I am talking about that word. Depression.
Depression runs in my family. My mom and 2 sisters have/had it and I always thought..."well that will never happen to me."
The first time I have ever heard of depression is when I was called to the Guidance Counselor's office in High School. She wanted to talk about my mom.
My mom used to (and still is in some ways) a strong, blunt, air force officer, nurse. She used to wake up before all of us and have her breakfast & coffee. Then she told me what she was going through... she was constantly worried about money (even though we had enough), that I would come home and find my dad dead. (he has heart problems), and so much more.
So awhile ago my husband and I got into a fight. I won't get into details but he said something to me that made me really upset. "You are only happy now when you are sleeping". I actually didn't get upset with him but actually myself. Because it dawned on me...oh my gosh...he's right.
I hadn't really paid attention to myself lately but that made me open my eyes. For the past few weeks and the few weeks after he said that, I realized I was changing.
I was wanting to do nothing. Literally. I don't want to go anywhere, eat, work out, read, read blogs, write blog posts, watch TV (that's big for me). Also I don't want to shower or get dressed. Besides feeding, changing, and dressing Mason, I just sit there. I would sit on the couch and just stare. Every now and then I play a game on my iPad, then just sit and stare.
Guss started getting worried and finally asked, what can we do? I wanted to go to the Doctor's but I don't really have good insurance. But I finally realized, I can't live like this...so next Wednesday I am off to the see a Doctor. I just hope it helps.