It really is. An ugly, ugly thing. In my opinion, jealousy is one of the worst feelings ever.
Besides depression, anxiety, OCD, I feel like this is the biggest thing I have always struggled with.
However, at times, I am confused why I struggle with this. I had a good childhood, parents who gave me attention and loved me, sisters who acted like siblings should, was always encouraged and never put down growing up.
The only thing I can think is being continually bullied and lack of self confidence.
My bullying is a whole other post but I believe it makes you feel smaller, like you aren't as good as everyone else.
My main struggles include:
* Friendship - Having your friend go out with other people without you or without even asking you. Having fun without you. Doing more things with other people, than you. It is absolutely ridiculous...but you can't help but feel it.
* Blog - more followers, more comments, etc.
* Looks - look at how pretty she is, skinny she is, how cool her clothes are
* Family - (this will completely confuse you but makes sense to me) why do my sisters have another sister they can be close with/make her the godmother of their child even though we are closer. And the fact that my other sister is pretty much a stranger to me.
- sounds like High School, huh? -
I am sensitive person. Always have been, always will. I don't always see it as a problem but when it comes to jealousy I do. In ways I have been getting better. I was seriously jealous when Guss & I first started dating. Now I am comfortable in my marriage, and trust him so it isn't really a problem. However I struggle daily...literally daily, with the rest. It bothers me, angers me, and shames me to think that something so small in certain cases can affect me.
I will probably work toward being free of jealousy my whole life. I wish I could just turn it off, but I can't
Do you struggle with jealousy? If you don't I envy you and I would love to hear some advice/tips.